The new math of modern motherhood

"𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘢 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘢𝘺, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯."

That was the sentiment of ambitious women I met at the 𝗙𝗲𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝗔𝘂𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻 brunch this weekend.

These women, many in their 20s and 30s, are building businesses, leading teams, and shaping their own brands.

Over mimosas and conversation, one theme kept resurfacing:

"𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧?"

Their question wasn't cynicism. It was clarity. "𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵. 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦... 𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬?"

For generations, women married "up"—seeking partners with higher status or income. It made sense when men were the sole breadwinners. Now that women can provide for themselves, that calculus is changing.

𝗗𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗳𝘁, 𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗻. A recent study found that among U.S. women under 35, 71% want or have children (15% were unsure, and 14% don't want them).

The desire for motherhood remains strong, but women are redefining 𝘩𝘰𝘸 and 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯.

Research conducted in 2021 found that among women who wanted children, the most common obstacles were:

👉 Focused on career (67%)

👉 Difficult childhood (44%)

👉 Haven't found the right person (36%)

👉 Infertility (22%)

I can relate to all those reasons.

If you want children but aren't sure when or how, it's time to make a plan rooted in purpose and empowerment:

1️⃣ Get clear on your values. What role do family and children play in your vision of a fulfilling life? What tradeoffs am I willing to make—and which am I not?

2️⃣ Plan your path. You can take action even if you don't have a partner or aren't ready for children yet. Start with a fertility assessment and explore egg freezing. These actions preserve your options and peace of mind.

3️⃣ Explore your childhood wounds. Many of us carry unhealed pain from the past. Working through childhood trauma helps you break limiting beliefs and generational patterns that keep us stuck.

4️⃣ Stay open to love, without pressure. Having a motherhood plan means you don't have to settle out of fear or desperation. Love can arrive on its own time, not your biological clock's deadline.

One woman at brunch captured it perfectly. She's approaching 30, owns a home, and runs her own company. She's considering freezing her eggs, but was concerned about the cost. After discussing her life goals, she realized egg freezing wasn't a luxury; it was an investment in her future.

The women I met inspired me. They aren't rejecting men, they’re rejecting limitations.

They want love and family on 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 terms—guided by intention, self-knowledge, and freedom.

That's what 𝗖𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗶'𝘀 𝗖𝗵𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 and empowered motherhood are all about: Creating your own path to motherhood based on clarity, confidence, and choice.

We're starting a new workshop in January to help women think through these issues and create their own motherhood plans. DM me to get early access when registration opens.